President Antichrist

I guess that it is my turn to talk about the historic changes going on in our country, namely the election of Barack Obama. Early in the election, I was sitting in a dream work seating arrangement, with the best coworkers of the century (teaching friends don't count because you don't sit and talk to them all day). Obama was popular with certain members of that crowd, and they were extolling his virtues for everyone within earshot. I was close to being to be won over, when another co-worker rained on their parade with some apocalyptic news. Let's call her Ana.

Ana: You all know that he's the Antichrist right?
Miss Jill: Could you please elaborate on that idea?
Ana: You know, he will form a worldwide government.
Miss Jill: Who gave you this idea?
Ana: A guy from my church. He reads the Bible a lot.
Miss Jill: Oh. Where exactly in the Bible does it say that Obama is the Antichrist?
Ana: Have you ever heard of the Book of Revelation? I'm not saying that I can stop it, but I refuse to be a part of it.

So, I became a bit concerned and googled "Obama Antichrist" and that was like discovering treasure, let me tell you. I had no idea that there was such a strong movement against the President. As I kept reading, I started getting too into the scriptures from Revelation (I wasn't seeing the connection with Obama though), and it really creeped me out. I started freaking out about the pending end of the world and started to feel the looming presence of the Antichrist in my apartment. Suddenly, the beloved dog of the house, Sam, looked outside and started barking out of control. I slammed shut the laptop, convinced that it was responsible for my feelings of impending doom. I started hyperventilating, and thoen the complex lost all electricity. I became hysterical, because it was obvoius that I was about to be murdered by Satan's minions. I called my roommate, hoping to at least make a human connection before my untimely demise. Luckily she answered from the parking lot. I fled to her car and we went to Carl's Jr. until I could calm down. I don't know if the events of that day were a sign, but if they were, I guess that I voted for the Antichrist. I even commissioned the creation of this cake for a departing coworker who will remain nameless: