You know that you just got MTAed when......
* You went to Harvard Business School and the man sleeping behind the booth makes more money than you, and has better benefits.
* CELEBRITY SIGHTING: You aren't positive, but you think that maybe you recognize the passenger next to you/climbing all over you as you peacefully sleep from An American Tail.
* You ride the same train so much that you notice that the homeless guy who was rejected from his family after being diagnosed with HIV last month is now a tourist from Philadelphia who was robbed.
* It's a weekend, so it takes you an hour to go a mile.
* You board the train and realize that the car is empty due to the overwhelming smell of human waste mixed with cheap rum. You quickly change cars, and just as the doors close, another homeless man looks up at you and asks, "Can you spare some change?"
* You just bought a DVD that someone made on his home computer in Chinatown.
* Service on your usual train has been replaced by shuttle buses, so you walk for 15 minutes to an alternate train. You think that you are so smart until you try to enter and are met with a facefull of caution tape.
* The conductor of the train leaves his little room to try to talk to you. This happened to me last week, hopefully these trains drive themselves.
* Someone proclaims that he used to be high on crack, but now is high on Jesus.
* A teenager tries to sell you a bag of Skittles for $5.00 to "keep [him] off the streets."
* It appears that a future Section 8 resident was just conceived on the seat next to you.
* You would be tempted to call Child Protection on a daily basis, if only you had cell phone service down there.
* The only time that you are happy that your tax money goes to this entity is when you don't want to pay for air conditioning in the summer, so you chill on public transportation all day.
* The bus driver lowers the wheelchair ramp so that a homeless guy can board with his cart (Thanks for this one Josh)
* You are three stops away from your house and suddenly the conductor announces, "This is the last stop."
* The service keeps getting worse, but you keep paying more for it.
sooooo true! so a few months ago my friend saw this lady in the train with a young kid who really needed to pee. so the mom gave the kid a bottle of water and had him pee in it. and this all happened right in front of my friend in the train. awesome.
ReplyDeleteYou have a near-heart attack when someone gets on the train and shouts, "everyone on this train should be afraid!.... you should be afraid because the end is coming. Have you been saved?"
ReplyDeleteThe normally express train going local is stopping at your local stop (sweet!), but the doors you are going to exit through don't open for some unknown reason and you stand and watch your stop fade into the distance.
You think it's your lucky day by getting into a suspiciously (to everyone else) empty car, only to realize the reason as soon as the doors close. (no AC, horrible stench, etc.)
Don't even get me started on buses.